In the Beginning...

At the parents'

I was born on March 6, 1976, in Suffolk, Virginia. I was raised in
Southampton County, Virginia.  I lived there with my parents, two
brothers, and grandfather. My grandfather instilled in me the value of


I am a product of a rural public school system. I was usually near the top of my class. I graduated from Southampton High School in 1994 as Salutatorian. I started Hampden-Sydney College in the fall of 1994. I took every opportunity to study outside of the country. I took a summer in Spain, a summer in Mexico, and a semester in England. I graduated from H-SC in May 1998 with a B.S. in Mathematics/Computer Science, Physics, Spanish.


Fresh out of college, nobody wanted to hire me. I sent out applications and résumés weekly and finally, two years after I graduated college, I was offered a position at Mary Washington College as the primary help desk technician. After two years and a complete reorganization, I found myself in the Office of Web Communications managing web and database servers and writing code. After another reorganization, I landed in the applications group that support enterprise applications at the institution.  Now, I'm back at the help desk.


I grew up knowing that I was different. I just didn't know how I was different. In high school I denied my confusing urges. In college I was met with plenty of time to 'find myself'. It was while in England that I actually accepted the fact that I am gay. But I stayed in the closet until I got out on my own, with my own income and my own apartment.

I met my first love, Ken, in October 2000, two months after getting my own place. After about two months, he decided that he did not feel the 'spark' of love between us and broke off the relationship. In December 2000, I met Jeff, my second love. In November 2001, he broke off the relationship. I will always love these two men. My first love taught me about myself, my second love helped me to come out. In the summer of 2001, I came out to my parents. This was the single most frightening moment in my life. Thankfully, my parents took it much better than I did. They are great parents.

I met Jessee in January of 2002. As soon as I saw him, I knew I loved him. We have been through a lot since we met, including a civil union in Vermont in April of 2003. We eventually grew apart, but remained friends.  Unfortunately, in 2017, he lost his battle with leukemia.  He will be missed by all impacted by his presence.

In May of 2015, by pure happenstance, I met someone and we started talking.  I'm now with that wonderful man and hope to spend many, many years with Andy.